Hover over each picture for information on the coaches.
Gooches: 2014, 2015, 2016
Nickname(s): “The People’s Champion” or “The Forsaken Champion”
Coaching Bio: For Coach Ben, this league has been heaven and hell. After a year of glory as the 2012 People’s Champ, Ben suffered three years as the league’s bottom bitch - each worse than the last. But in 2017, he fought off his league-induced alcoholism and inferiority complex to miss his fourth straight Gooch. From Coach Ben you can expect passion, anger, and unpredictable fantasy choices.
Nickname(s): “The Sidekick in his Own Life”
Coaching Bio: Coach Keith is always a bridesmaid never a bride. This perpetual playoff contender has made the post-season 4 of the last 5 years but has consistently fallen short of greatness. However, you’ll never see this coach sweat. Each year, he garners success through minimal effort to the resentment of everyone. From Coach Keith, you can expect a level head, minimal mid-season moves, and a playoff bust.
Gooches: 2007, 2011, 2017
Nickname(s): “The Father" or "The Bringer of Baby Magic"
Coaching Bio: Coach Daniel has had an up and down fantasy career. Though he appeared in the 2009 and 2014 Szeperbowls, more often than not he has been a Gooch contender. Prophets say the 2017 birth of his first child will catapult Coach Daniel to glory, but skeptics point to his 2017 Gooch as proof of the opposite. There’s a lot to watch here, so count on Coach Daniel to deliver strange decisions, poor performances, and the potential emergence of baby magic.
Plaques: 2007, 2015
Nickname(s): “The League Historian” or “The League Bitch”
Coaching Bio: Coach Sam co-created this podcast to remind everyone he is tied for the second most plaques. Maybe more than anyone, Sam loves fantasy football. He records our league history, begins draft-prep 13 months out, and stays up praying he will become the best. These put a clear target on his back, and each year, it’s fun to watch him reach a boiling point. From Coach Sam, you can expect an unhealthy fantasy obsession, boom or bust teams, and attempts to belittle Ryan to calm his own ego.
Nickname(s): “Genghis Kan" or "#teamJkan"
Coaching Bio: Coach JKan is experiencing something unprecedented; he’s become a fantasy contender. After joining the league in 2010, he made his first playoff appearance in 2015 and his first Szeperbowl appearance in 2016. But the women, money, and media can be a lot for a young coach, and it’s unclear whether the success has gone to his head. From Coach JKan, you can expect a positive attitude, a love of fantasy football, and an inability to maintain a winning streak.
Plaques: 2014, 2016
Nickname(s): “Lady Luck's Enemy"
Coaching Bio: Coach Jordan surged into prominence with dominant 2014 and 2016 Szeperbowl wins. And he has yet to let anyone forget it. In his up weeks, Jordan owns opponents on Sunday and reminds them Monday-Saturday. In his down weeks, he complains that he has terrible luck (which is only sometimes true). From Coach Jordan, you can expect fantasy prowess, complaints, and a sense that he’s being treated unfairly.
Plaques: 2008, 2012
Nickname(s): “The World Trade Center”
Coaching Bio: Historically, Coach Harland has been a powerhouse. But he has not made the playoffs since 2014, and his moves are becoming increasingly erratic. In 2016, he set the record for most trades in a season, and in 2017, he skipped the draft to float in the Mediterranean Sea. Who knows what crazy thing he will try next? From Coach Harland, you can expect blockbuster trades, disappointed expectations, and a fierce rivalry with Coach Scott.
Plaques: 2009, 2010, 2011, 2017
Nickname(s): “The Worst" or "The Ex-Commissioner"
Coaching Bio: Coach Scott wants you to pay attention to his four plaques and ignore his shady history. During his first three wins, his commissionership was shrouded in controversy. By 2012, the grassroots ‘DON’T LET SCOTT WIN’ movement gained ground, and Coach Harland beat him in the 2012 and 2013 playoffs. But he resurfaced in 2017, decisively winning his 4th plaque, and now he’s more obnoxious than ever. From Coach Scott, you can expect fantasy talent wrapped in an unpleasant God-complex.
Nickname(s): “The Rookie"
Coaching Bio: Though we have only seen one year so far, Coach Eddy has been a force. Many were unsure about his 2017 draft, but he quieted critics, riding fantasy prowess (and Alvin Kamara) to the Szeperbowl. Plus, it was his first year playing with defensive players! Time will tell what Coach Eddy’s future holds, but so far, we can expect clever moves and more clever team names.
Nickname(s): "The Commissioner" or “The Evil Overlord"
Coaching Bio: Coach Ryan is frustrated. He has not been in the Szeperbowl since 2008, he deals with wide-spread entitlement as the commissioner, and we mercilessly mock him on this show. That may sound mean, but his reasonable decisions keep backfiring in hilarious ways. Likely, he is distracted exploring how to abuse his commissioner powers without anyone realizing it (an art Scott perfected). From Coach Ryan, you can expect middle-of-the-road performances, commissioner abuses of power, and a love-hate relationship with the Fireside Fantasy Chat.